Wow, how time flies! I feel like it was just yesterday that I was celebrating the dawn of a new year, 2016, with my family and friends on a cold winter’s night. With a blink of an eye, it was February 14th 2016, and I was celebrating my 2nd Valentine’s Day with Derek.
It made me contemplate the holiday, and what it means to me.
Not even two weeks ago, Derek and I made a huge move, we bought a house together, and it will be ours this November. The applause that happens inside my head every time I think of this new chapter that is starting in our lives, is deafening! I am so excited! And this is why…
If you would have told me 2 years ago that men like Derek existed, I would have told you to jump off a mountain without a parachute. I am sure a lot of ladies out there (and men too, I’m sure!) feel the same way, so perhaps what I am writing doesn’t come as a shock. I have dated all kinds: the unambitious, the alcoholic, the narcissist, the liar, the thief, and the best of all of them, the cheater. Some of these stops along the way, I am not proud of, but they happened, and yadda, yadda, yadda, they make me, me.
I had buried myself in my work for months before we met, healing from one of the most traumatic relationships of my life, and my camera was my only solace. I focused on bettering myself as an artist, and proving to the world, and most importantly, myself that I could crawl out from under the shadow that was following me around, and succeed on my own.
When I met Derek, through a friend, I was well on my way to becoming a cat lady, well a cat and camera lady, and I was okay with that. I had lost all faith in the like of man. I was pessimistic, bitter, and did not trust anyone as far as I could throw them. Derek was patient, understanding, and most of all, he saw something in me that I thought I had long lost… Self worth.
Months after, I kept denying that we were an item, through parties with friends, countless dates during the week, and meeting his parents. Pure denial. I wasn’t ready to give my heart again and jump into deep waters with anyone else… or so I thought.
Fast forward almost 2 years… a house! A true commitment. Love.
Over time, I began to trust him, learning more and more about his character (and he has lots of it!) and seeing that all men weren’t built the same. He restored my faith in men.
This Valentine’s, broke from buying a home, and preparing ourselves for a life full of new responsibilities, we spent Valentine’s Day curled up on a couch in his parent’s basement, with a bottle of wine, a good movie, and the fire place going strong… and it was everything I ever wanted. It felt like home.
If someone doesn’t make you feel loved, safe, and appreciated, find someone that will, and they exist ladies; good, solid men, that have good upbringings, respect for their mothers, a strong work ethic, a sense of responsibility, and most importantly, they have good hearts.
DON’T give up! DON’T settle! But DO call me when it’s time for wedding photos! ^_^
Lighting Set Up by Carmela Sagula
Photo and Make Up by my good friend and talented artist, Katerina Rapoport. Check out her work @ www.katerinarapoport.com